"Darnet." - Iron Joe after finding out she's not fighting Yang

It was September 29, 2015. Hercule Satan vs. Dan Hibiki, the best Death Battle episode ever, had just finished in its wondrous glory, devoid of Dragonball downplay. Afterwards, the demoness known as Yang Xiao Long made herself known. Her doomed opponent, however, was so frightened that she did not dare to even show up until she absolutely had to. Ergo, speculation ensued on just who exactly her opponent might be. One man - one moron - by the name of Iron Joe, for some reason just so desperately wanted Yang's opponent to be this individual. Then again, he is the local Yang-hating psychopath on the ScrewAttack forum (even though he didn't start being one until after the Death Battle), so it makes sense that he'd want such a spite match. Of course, in the end, it was confirmed by TheLousyTactician that this individual will not be fighting Yang, just because Iron Joe was being such a baby about it. Only babies explain their unpopular opinions.

She uses gauntlets, plays the "big sister" role in her own canon, lacks a father, and has all the other things that Tifa has in common with Yang while she doesn't.

Powers and Stats

Tier: Stronger Than You

Name: Gauntet (They wouldn't stop calling her that despite Iron Joe's insistence that her name is "Garnet," so that must be her name)

Age: Subject to change, as anyone's age is. Born on September 30, 2015.

Classification: typo, Crystal Gem, nothing like Yang, extremely overpowered character, casual Yang buster, their fury, their patience, their conversation

Origin: The G1 Chat, also Steven Universe I think?

Gender: Nonbinary, uses female pronouns. She's a rock so while you probably can put it in her she'll probably wind up like Rose...that and she is two child rocks fused together.

Powers and Abilities: Swimming in lava, punching really really hard, and I mean REALLY hard, not being in Death Battle, flame war creation, style manipulation, precognition, electrokinesis

Attack Potency: At least High Multi-Solar System Level (putting her against Yang is considered a spite match in her favor, even though Yang effortlessly murdered Tifa), likely way way higher (for the same reason; after all, Yang herself is at least Tier -1)

Speed: Faster than Yang (I mean, all joking aside this is almost definitely the case, especially with dat precognition)

Durability: Durable Enough (she can swim in lava for Pete's sake)

Lifting Strength: Would it be unfunny to say "Stronger Than You" again?

Striking Strength: dude holy crap have you seen Steven Universe

Standard Equipment: Her gauntlets, lo-o-o-o-ove, lo-o-o-o-ove, lo-o-o-o-ove, which is stronger than you

Intelligence: Hopefully smarter than the idiot who wanted her to fight Yang

Range: Not in Death Battle

Stamina: Pretty much infinite (rocks don't get tired and neither do typos)

Weaknesses: Lacks a good 3D model, had nothing to do with Monty Oum at any point in time

Notable Victories:


I'd put Yang here but spite matches don't belong here

Notable Losses:


Sans (she's made of LOVE, so that KR messed her up somethin' fierce. Afterwards, he made a fan-parody of her song that was pretty cool until it got animated 10000000000000000 times)

Inconclusive Matches:


(Note: I am Iron Joe, and am well aware that, if we were to strictly use each character's canonical forms, Garnet would, in fact, stomp Yang...but not Tifa. Oh heck no.)